The invention of the CB radio

The CB radio was invented in 1945 by Al Gross, the inventor of the walkie-talkie and owner of the Citizens Radio Corporation. The radio became popular with small businesses and blue-collar workers like carpenters, plumbers, and electricians who used the radio as a tool to communicate with coworkers. By 1960, the costs to produce the 23-channel radio were low enough that everyday Joes could afford to buy one. By 1973, coinciding with the onset of the oil crisis, the CB Radio craze erupted.

FCC opens up CB radio channels to the public

my friend al gorss inventor of the walkie talkie

When Al Gross invented the CB radio in 1945, the Federal Communications Commission (FCC) quickly opened radio services for personal users of the radio. Most countries already had similar radio services. In the United States, Citizen’s Band Radios was assigned the 27-Mhz band. Although today the CB radio does not require a license, at the time of their introduction, the FCC did require a license to operate.

By the 1960’s, CB radio was popular with businesses and radio hobbyists. By the late 1960’s, advancements in solid state electronics allowed the size of the radio to be reduced as well as the cost. Suddenly, the public had access to a communications medium that previously had only been available to specialists. CB radio clubs were formed, and hobbyists developed their own unique CB slang language along with 10-codes similar to the codes used by emergency services.

The CB Radio Craze

woolco cb radio sale lafayette square shopping center advertisement

By 1973, the oil crisis caused the cost of gasoline to skyrocket, and shortages developed overnight. In response, the United States government issued a 55 MPH nationwide speed limit. Drivers quickly learned that CB radios could be used to communicate with other drivers, to inform them of gas stations that had gas and to notify speeders where police (smokeys) had speed traps set up. CB radio became so popular, by 1977 additional channels were opened (beyond the original 23) and 40 channel radios were introduced to the market.

Below are the FCC regulated CB radio channels.

Newsworthy events related to CB radios further added to the excitement. Truck drivers used the radios to organize convoys (huge lines of trucks that travelled down the nation’s highways). In several instances, blockades were organized using CB Radios where trucks would fill all available highway lanes in protest of the high gas prices and new trucking regulations.

CB Radios began to play prominent roles in movies such as Smokey and the Bandit and Movin’ On. Novelty songs about the new electronic toy, such as CW McCall’s Convoy and Cletus Maggard’s White Knight (see lyrics below), were played regularly on the radio and became Top 40 hits.

During the CB radio craze, citizens of Great Britain began illegally using American made CBs. The British government told its citizens that the CB radio would never be legalized on the 27 MHz wavelength and instead, proposed a different technology on the 860 MHz “open channel” instead. The citizens of the United Kingdom took to the streets in high profile public demonstrations and UK government officials bent to the will of the people. Al Gross made the first British ceremonial CB radio call from Trafalgar Square in London. Later the United Kingdom added more than forty channels giving UK citizens 80 CB radio channels to work with.

Handles

Years prior, CB radios required a licensed to operate. The license cost about $20 in the early 1970’s and was reduced to $4 in the late 1970’s. In addition, there were many rules and regulations concerning antenna height, distance restrictions, allowable transmitter power, and call sign rules. People ignored the laws and hid their identity, using “handles” or fake names to identify themselves on the radio. After the FCC started receiving over 1,000,000 license applications a month, the license requirement was dropped entirely but as the culture had already developed, people continued using handles such as “Big Mama” or “Timberwolf” to identify themselves while on the air.

Some celebrity handles included Betty Ford, a former First Lady of the United States, whose CB handle was “First Mama”, and voice actor Mel Blanc , an active CB Radio operator, often used the CB handles Bugs or Daffy and talked over the air in the Los Angeles area using his many voices.

CB radio channels

Channels evolved to fill specific purposes. For instance, channel 9 was kept open for emergency use and channel 19 was used for highway communication west of the Mississippi River. Eventually channel 19 became the “trucker’s channel” and was used for highway communication all over the United States. In the early days of the CB radio craze, channel 11 was used solely for the purpose of initiating communications (after which the two radio callers switched to a mutually agreed upon channel). Towns that were close together often adopted a specific channel as their “home” channel so that they could communicate with each other.

Talking the Talk

citizen band radio vexilar cb advertisement

CD etiquette developed and evolved during the CD radio craze. CB radios were intended to be used to warn other drivers of Smokeys up the road or to report roadside emergencies. Chit chatting with other CB radio users is ok, but it is not considered courteous to hold up a channel for more than a few minutes. Cursing is also frowned upon.

It is common for CB radio operators to use hidden code or unique slang to communicate. For instance, when giving a warning that a police officer is running a hidden speed trap, they might say “smokey in the bush” or to warn truckers to watch out for a broken-down school bus they might say “watch out for the kiddy car at mile marker 200”. Many of the CB slang from the 1970’s hung around and became slang that continued to be used outside the realm of CB radio communications. Below is a large list of CB radio slang used during the 1970’s CB radio craze.

CD Radio slang from a to z

ACE – an important or well-known CB radio operator
Apple – a person who is addicted to CB radio
AF -Audio Frequency
Afterburner – Linear amplifier
ALERT – Affiliated League of Emergency Radio Teams
All the good numbers – good luck and best wishes to all
Alligator – shredded tread from the tires of an 18-wheeler truck
Amigo – friend or good buddy
ANL – Automatic noise limiter
Ankle biter- a little kid
Antenna Farm- a CB radio station with many antennas strung up in the air
Antler Alley – an area known for deer crossings
Appliance Operator – degrading term for a non-technical person who barely knows how to turn on their radio
AM -Amplitude Modulation
Ancient Mariner – someone who uses AM radio
Baby Bear – a rookie police officer
Backdoor – vehicle behind the one who is ahead of it.
Backdoor closed – the rear of a convoy with trucks stacked across the lanes to keep the Smokeys out
Back em up – slow down or reduce speed
Back off the hammer – slow down or reduce speed
Backslide – return trip from a trucker’s run
Bad scene – a crowded CB radio channel
Ballet Dancer – a CB radio antenna that sways and bends in the wind
Base Station – a CB radio installed at a fixed location such as a house
Beast -a very good CB radio rig
Beam – Directional Antenna
Bean House Bull – trucker conversation carried on at a truck stop
Bear Bait – a speeding car
Bear Cage- police station or jail cell
Bear Cave – police station
Bearmobile – police car
Bear Trap – stationary police car running a radar trap
Bear in the air- police in their helicopter
Bear – police officer
Beat the bushes – driving ahead of the other truckers to draw the police out of hiding
Beaver – good looking female
Beaver Bear – female police officer
Beaver Fever – missing the wife or girlfriend
Beaver Palace – a club or bar known for loose female patrons
Beaver Patrol – looking for a good-looking woman to spend time with
Big Charlie or Big Daddy – the Federal Communications Commission (FCC)
Big Mack – Mack truck
Big Slab – freeway or highway
Big 10-4- hearty agreement.
Bit on the seat of the britches – pulled over and issued a speeding ticket
Black and White – police car
Black Ice – patch of iced over blacktop road
Bleeding/Bleedover – strong signals from a base station on another channel that interferes with another channel’s reception
Blew my doors off – car passed by at high speed
Blue Slip- speeding ticket
Boast Toastie – CB expert
Boat Anchor – an old, broken radio that can no longer be repaired
Bodacious- Awesome
Boy Scouts – State Police
Box -Tractor Trailer
Break (or breaker, break for) – request to use the channel
Breaking Up – CB radio reception is poor
Breaking the ‘ol needle – very strong CB radio signal
Bring it back – answer the question that was posed
Brown paper bag – unmarked Police car
Bubble gum machine- police car with flashing lights
Bucket Mouth – obnoxious radio operator or someone who cusses a lot on the air
Bug Out – signing off or leaving the radio channel
Bumper Lane – the left most passing lane
Button Pusher – another CB radio operator who is trying to breakup your communication with another station by keying the microphone
Camera -police radar
Candy Man – Federal Communications Commission (FCC)
Casa – house
Cash Register – toll booth
Catch you on the flip-flop – will talk to you on my return trip
Channel 25 – the telephone
Charlie – Federal Communications Commission (FCC)
Chew and choke – Restaurant or truck stop eatery
Checking My Eyelinds For Pin Holes – I am tired or sleepy
Check the seatcovers – look at that passenger in the passing car
Chicken Coup – weigh station
Chicken Coup is Clean – weigh station is closed.
Chicken Inspector – weigh station inspector
Chopped Top- a very short antenna
Christmas Card – speeding ticket
Chrome Dome – a mobile radio with a dome antenna on top of the car
Clean Cat – an unmodified CB radio
Clean Shot – the road ahead is free of obstructions, construction, and police
Cleaner channel – CB radio channel with less traffic on it
Clear – Final transmission “This is 505 and I’m clear”
Clear after you – you are ending transmission after the other person finishes signing off
Coffee Bean – Waiter or waitress
Cold Rig – 18-wheeler pulling a refrigerated trailer
Collect Call – call for a specific CB radio operator
Colorado Kool Aid – beer
Come again – repeat your last transmission
Come Back – answer my call
Comic Book -truckers logbook
Coming in Loud ‘n Proud – loud and clear signal
Concrete Blonde – prostitute
Convoy – 2 or more vehicles traveling the same route in a row
Cooking – driving
Cooking Good – reached desired speed.
Copy – receiving a message
Copying the mail – listening to the communications on the channel
County Mountie – county police or sheriff
Covered Up – transmission was blocked by interference
Crack ’em Up – traffic accident
Cradle Baby – radio operator who is afraid to ask someone to stand by
Cup of Mud – cup of coffee
Cut Out – leaving the channel
Cut Some Z’s – get some sleep
Cut The Coax – turn off the radio
Daddy-O – Federal Communications Commission (FCC)
Dead Pedal – slow moving car or truck
Dead Key – keying the mike without talking
Decoy – empty or unmanned police car
Diesel Digit – channel 19
Diesel Juice – truck fuel
Dime Channel – channel 10
Dirty Side – Eastern Seaboard
Dixie Cup – female operator with southern accent
Doing the Five-Five- traveling at 55mph
Doin’ it to it – Full speed
Doing our thing in the left-hand lane – full speed in the passing or left-hand lane
Do it to me – answer back
Do you copy? – Do you understand?
Don’t Tense – calm down
Don’t Feed The Bears – don’t get a ticket
Double key – two radio operators talking at the same time
Double L – telephone call
Double Nickel – 55mph (the speed limit during the 1970’s CB radio craze)
Down “˜n Out or Down and gone – signing off
Down and on the side – through talking but will continue listening
Drag Your Feet – wait a few seconds before transmitting to see if someone else wants to break in
Dream Weaver – sleepy driver who is weaving across the lanes
Dress For Sale – prostitute or dressed like a prostitute
Drop Out – fading signal
Drop Stop Destination – where freight will be dropped off
Drop the Hammer – drive fast
Dropped it off the shoulder – ran off the shoulder of the road
Dusted your britches – keyed up at the same time
Dusted my britches – passed me very fast
Dusted Your Ears- transmission interrupted
DX – Long Distance
Eager beaver – anxious young woman
Ears ON – CB radio turned ON
Eights or Eighty-eights – love and kisses
Eights and other good numbers – love and kisses, and best wishes
Eighty-eight’s around the house – good luck and best wishes to you and yours
Eyeball- Personal meeting
Everybody must be walking the dog – all channels are busy
Evil Knievel – motorcycle policeman
Fake brake – driver riding with his foot on the brake
Fat load – overweight or big truck load
Feed The Bears – paying a speeding fine
Fender bender – traffic accident
Fifty Dollar Lane – passing lane
First Sargent – wife
Flag waver – highway repair crew
Flaps down – slow down
Flappers -ears
Flip flop – return trip
Flip-Flopping Bears – police reversing direction or turning around
Flop it – turn around
Flop box – motel or room in truck stop
FM – Frequency Modulation
Follow the stripes home – have a safe trip
Footwarmer – Linear amplifier
Forty weight – coffee
Four Wheeler – Car
Four lane parking lot – highway with traffic backed up
Four legged go-go dancers – ugly women
Fox – pretty female
Fox Charlie Charlie – FCC
Fox hunt – FCC hunting for illegal operators
Fox jaws – Female with nice voice, but not necessarily a body to match
Free Ride – prostitute
Freight Box – trailer for the truck
Friendly Candy Company – FCC
Front Door – the lead in a convoy
Full of vitamins – running all out
Full Bore – driving fast as you can
Full Throttle – driving fast as the truck will let you
Funny Candy Company – FCC
Funny channels – channels that are outside the legal band
Gallon – 1000 watts of power
Garbage – too much small talk on a channel
Gas Jockey – gas station attendant
Gear – overnight bag or supplies
Get horizontal – go to sleep
Get Trucking – start driving
Girlie Bear – female police officer
Give me a shout – call me on the radio
Glory Card – Class D License
Go Breaker – OK to go ahead and break into the channel
Go Ahead – your turn to talk or reply
Go Juice – truck fuel
Go to channel 41 – a joke to get someone off the radio (there is no channel 41)
Going Horizontal – going to sleep
Gone – leaving the channel
Gone 10-7 – permanently dead
Good Buddy – friend (modern day means homosexual)
Goon Squad – people who do not share the channel
Got my shoes on – Switched the linear ON
Got your ears on? – are you listening on this channel
Got my eyeballs peeled – looking hard
Got my foot in it – speeding up
Go to 100 – go to the bathroom
Green Stamps – cash money
Green Stamp Collector – police with radar
Green Stamp lane – passing lane
Green Stamp Road – toll road.
Grease monkey – mechanic
Greasy Spoon – restaurant with bad food
Ground Clouds – fog
Gypsy – trucker who drives for an independent company
Hack – taxicab
Hag Feast – group of female CB radio operators on the channel
Haircut palace – bridge or overpass with low clearance
Hairpin – sharp curve
Hamburger helper – Linear Amp
Hammer – gas pedal
Hammer Off – slow down
Hammer Down – speed up
Hang it in your ear – that was a stupid comment
Handle – CB radio code name
Hay Shaker – truck transporting a mobile home
Heading for a hole – about to head into a low spot where radio transmission may not be possible
Heater – Linear amplifier
Hell bent for leather – driving fast
Hiding in the grass – police parked on a median strip
Hiding in the bushes, sitting under the leaves – hidden police car
Highball – drive non-stop to the destination
High Rise – large bridge or overpass
Hippie Chippie – female hitchhiker
Hip Pocket – glove box
Hit the cobblestones – hit the road
Hog – Harley Davidson
Home Twenty – location of your home
How tall are you? – How tall is your truck?
Hundred mile coffee – very strong coffee
Ice Box – Refrigerated trailer.
Idiot Box – TV set
In a short – soon
In a short-short – very soon
In the mud – noise on the channel
In the Pokey with Smokey – arrested
Jack – good friend
Jack Rabbit – police officers
Jam – deliberately interfere with another station.
Japanese toy – CB
Jargon – CB lingo
Jaw Jacking – talking, talking needlessly
Jewelry – lights on a rig
Jingle – call on the telephone
Johnny Law – police officer
Juke Joint – small or out-of-the-way place to eat
Jump Down – switch to a lower channel
Jump Up – switch to a higher channel
Keep ’em Between the Ditches – have a safe trip
Keep the shiny side up and the greasy side down – drive safely
Keep the wheels spinning – drive safely
Keep your noise between the ditches and smokey out of your britches – drive carefully, lookout for police
Keying the mike – activating the microphone without speaking
Kicker – Linear amplifier
Kiddie car – school bus
Knock the stack out – speed up
Knuckle Buster – fight
Kojak – police officer
Kojak with a Kodak – policeman with a radar
Lady Bear – female police officer
Lady Breaker – Female CB operator asking for a break.
Lame – broken down vehicle
Land Line – telephone
Land Yacht – mobile home or camper
Lane Flipper – car or truck that keeps changing lanes
Lane Lover – driver who will not get out of the lane
Latrine Lips – radio operator who cusses
Let the channel roll – it’s ok to break in and request use of the channel
Legal Beagle – person who always follows the rules
Lettuce – money
Lights green, bring on the machine – road is clear of police and other slowdowns
Linear – RF amplifier
Little Bear – local police officer
Little Beaver – daughter
Little Bit – prostitute
Little Brother – friend
Local Bear – local police officer
Local Yokel – small town police officer
Log some Z’s – get some sleep
Loot Limo – armored car
M20 – place to meet
Magic Mile – the end of a trip
Mama – girlfriend or wife
Mama Bear – female police officer
Man in White – doctor
Mashing the mike – keying the mike (usually without talking)
Meatwagon – ambulance.
Modulate – talk
Modulating – talking
Money Bus – armored truck
Motion Lotion – fuel
Motorcycle Mama – woman riding on a motorcycle
Muck Truck – cement truck
Nap Trap – hotel or another place to sleep
Negative – no
Negative Copy – did not hear
Neon, Freon, Ion Jockey – truck driver with many lights on his rig
Nightcrawlers – many police in the area
Niner – channel 9
Ninety Weight – alcohol
Oil burner – diesel truck
On the by or on the standby – listening but not talking.
One foot on the floor, one hanging out the door, and she just won’t do no more – driving as fast as I can
Other Half – girlfriend or wife
Out – through transmitting
Over – your turn to transmit
Over modulation – talking so loudly that audio is distorted
Pack it in – ending transmission
Pair of sevens – no contact or answer
Papa Bear – state trooper with CB radio
Paper hanger – police giving ticket
Parking Lot – traffic jam
Pavement Princess – prostitute
Peanut butter in his ears – is not listening
Pedal to the metal – drive fast
Peeling Off – getting of the freeway
Plain Wrapper – unmarked police car
Play Dead – stand by
Picture taking machine – radar
Pit Stop – stop for a bathroom break
Popcorn – hal
Porcupine – car with a lot of antennas on it
Pounding the pavement – waking
Press some sheets – sleep
Pull the hammer back – slow down
Pull the plug – signoff and turn the radio off
Put an eyeball on him – saw or see
Put it on the floor and looking for some more – trying to drive as fast as possible
QSL Card – Personalized postcard sent to confirm a conversation
QSK – break
QRM – noise or interference
Q-R-Mary – nose or interference
QSY – changing channels/frequency.
QRT – signing off
QRX – wait
QSB – noise
QSO – conversation
QTH – location
Quasar – female
Radio Runt – child breaking in on a channel.
Rain Locker – shower
Rake the leaves – last vehicle in a convoy
Ratchet-Jaw – non-stop talker
REACT – Radio Emergency Associated Citizens Teams
Rebound – return trip
Red Lighted – pulled over by police
REST – Radio Emergency Safety Teams
RF – Radio Frequency
Road Jockey – truck driver
Road Ranger – police officer
Rock – slang for crystal
Rockin’ chair – car in the middle of a convoy
Roger – O.K.
Roller Skate – car
Rolling – driving
Rolling Bears – police officers driving
Rugrats – children
Rubberneckers – onlookers
Running Barefoot – using a radio at the legal output
Running on rags – driving a vehicle with little to no tread on the tires.
Running Shotgun – driving partner
San Quentin Jailbait – under age female hitch hiker
Seatcover – good looking female
Shaking the windows – loud and clear reception
Shim – illegally amplified transmitter
Shoot the breeze – casual conversation
Shovelling coal – speeding up
Show-off lane – passing lane
Skip – atmospheric conditions that cause signals to travel much farther than they normally would
Skippers – radio operators talking long distance
Sidedoor – passing lane
Sitting in the saddle – middle truck in a convoy
“S” Meter – meter on your radio which indicates the signal strength
Smokey – State Police
Smokey Bear – State Police
Smokey report – police location report
Smokey Dozing – police sitting in a parked car
Smokey’s thick – police are everywhere
Smokey with a camera – police with radar
Smokey with ears – policeman with CB radio in their car
Somebody stepped on you – someone transmitted while you were talking
Splatter – bleedover from another channel
Squelch – control on radio which silences the speaker until a signal of a certain strength breaks through it
Three’s and eights – signing off, best wishes
Thin – very weak signal
Twelves – I have company present
Twenty – Location
Two Stool beaver – very fat woman
Uncle Charlie – FCC
Walking on you – someone talking over you
Wall-to-wall and treetop tall – strong, clear signal
Wall-to-wall and ten feet tall – strong clear signal
Warden – girlfriend or wife
Watch the pavement – drive safely
Water hole – truck stop
Wear your bumper out – following too close
Wearing socks – has linear amplifier
What am I putting on you? – how strong is my signal
What’s your twenty? – what is your location
Whip – long CB antenna
Who do you pull for? – who do you work for?
Wooly Bear – female
Z’s – Sleep

CB radio 10-codes

In addition to CB radio slang, CB radio operators used a series of “10 codes” similar to the codes used by emergency radio operators.

The Complete CB 10 codes

10-1 Receiving Poorly
10-2 Receiving Well
10-3 Stop Transmitting
10-4 Ok, Message Received
10-5 Relay Message
10-6 Busy, Stand By
10-7 Out of Service, Leaving Air
10-8 In Service, subject to call
10-9 Repeat Message
10-10 Transmission Completed, Standing By
10-11 Talking too Rapidly
10-12 Visitors Present
10-13 Advise weather/road conditions
10-16 Make Pickup at…
10-17 Urgent Business
10-18 Anything for us?
10-19 Nothing for you, return to base
10-20 My Location is ……… or What’s your Location?
10-21 Call by Telephone
10-22 Report in Person too ……
10-23 Stand by
10-24 Completed last assignment
10-25 Can you Contact …….
10-26 Disregard Last Information/Cancel Last Message/Ignore
10-27 I am moving to Channel ……
10-28 Identify your station
10-29 Time is up for contact
10-30 Does not conform to FCC Rules
10-32 I will give you a radio check
10-33 Emergency Traffic at this station
10-34 Trouble at this station, help needed
10-35 Confidential Information
10-36 Correct Time is ………
10-38 Ambulance needed at ………
10-39 Your message delivered
10-41 Please tune to channel ……..
10-42 Traffic Accident at ……….
10-43 Traffic tie-up at ………
10-44 I have a message for you
10-45 All units within range please report
10-50 Break Channel
10-62 Unable to copy, use phone
10-62sl unable to copy on AM, use Sideband – Lower (not an official code)
10-62su unable to copy on AM, use Sideband – Upper (not an official code)
10-65 Awaiting your next message/assignment
10-67 All units comply
10-70 Fire at …….
10-73 Speed Trap at …………
10-75 You are causing interference
10-77 Negative Contact
10-84 My telephone number is ………
10-85 My address is ………..
10-91 Talk closer to the mike
10-92 Your transmitter is out of adjustment
10-93 Check my frequency on this channel
10-94 Please give me a long count
10-95 Transmit dead carrier for 5 sec.
10-99 Mission completed, all units secure
10-100 Need to take a break
10-200 Police needed at ……….

How to operate a CB radio

There is an etiquette that CB radio operators follow to be “polite” and courteous to the other CB radio users. The following rules should always be followed.

ltd by browning advertisement cb magazine november 1973

When two or more people are talking on a channel they are said to “own the channel”. FCC regulations require they give other users an opportunity to use the channel so they should not hold the channel hostage for more than several minutes.

CB radio users should not “step on” other units. “Step on” means to transmit at the same time another radio operator is transmitting. They should also never key over someone else.

If you hear one unit break for another unit, give some time for the unit to respond before you say anything yourself. It may take a radio user time to grab the mic or get from the kitchen to the living room radio unit.

After your break has been acknowledged, keep the next transmission short. For example, a break might go something like this: “Break one-nine for Super Trooper. Super Trooper, do you have your ears on?”. If Super Trooper does not answer after a minute or so, it is nice to acknowledge that you are finished by saying something like “thanks for the break”.

If you are carrying on a conversation and someone “walks over” you, you have one of two options. You can ask the person you were speaking to repeat. For example, “10-9, you were stepped on. Please repeat”. Alternatively, you can hand the channel over to the breaker.

If your break is not acknowledged, wait several minutes before attempting to contact them again.

White Knight song lyrics

White Knight (by Cletus Maggard and the Citizen’s Band)

cledus maggard and the citizen band the white knight

The White Knight was a popular CB radio song in 1976 – it charted at #1 on the radio charts. The song tells the story of a truck driver who receives a CB call from an individual claiming to be a truck driver. Identifying himself as the White Knight, the other driver assists the trucker by offering tips on where the smokeys were hiding. Unfortunately, the White Knight turns out to be a highway patrolman who has used the CB radio to broadcast misleading traffic information to truck drivers, luring them into a speed-trap. Here are the complete lyrics:

Down 75 or 85,
Or I-20 t’other way,
Turn your squelch to the right
And in the night
You’ll hear some good buddy say,
“Breaker breaker,
Got a picture taker,
All Smokeys at forty three.”
It’s that Japanese toy,
The trucker’s joy
That everybody calls CB.
Yeah, Citizen’s Band, keeps you up to date
On fender benders and Tijuana taxis,
And all them bears out there a flip floppin’
Now ahead of your children and ahead of your wife
On the list of the ten best things in life,
Your CB’s gotta rate right around number four.
‘Course beavers and hot biscuits and Merle Haggard
Come one, two, three, you know.
Well I was loaded down, coming outta Lake City;
I was checkin’ out seat covers, young and pretty,
When all of a sudden there come a call
Over my CB, ringin’ wall to wall,
Said clove her double nickels till you hit the ridge,
‘Cause there’s a Smokey picture taker t’other side of the bridge.
“Oh mercy, ‘ppreciate that, good buddy;
What’s your handle there, come on?
You got any county mounties out there prowlin’, come on?”
And he said —
“Ten four…back door,
Put the peddle to the metal and…let it roar
Hammer down…to Macon town…
Gonna see my momma for sure.
Well, the bears are gone,
Let’s…bring it on…
The Georgia line’s…out of sight.
Pulled outta Richmond town last Saturday night,
And my handle is…the White Knight,
How ’bout it?”
“All right, White Knight, hammer down,
You got the mean machine here.”
I was a streakin’
My needle was a peakin’
A right around seventy nine.
That old diesel juice
Was a gettin’ loose,
And everything was fine.
But wall to wall
I got a call
Front door, big bear trapper.
Said, “Break one nine,
Good buddy of mine,
You got a Smokey in a plain white wrapper.”
Well I jammed my stick,
I lost twenty quick;
You could hear them gears a tearin’.
I got passed by a beaver,
And a Camaro,
I was cruisin’ alone
And going so slow
I could count every button on that frilly blouse she was wearin’.
‘Course there weren’t but one.
“Hey there, super trooper!
Yeah — that’s the crafty Smokey over there with a CB of his own.
Hey White Knight, let’s slide one on the super trooper, come on?”
“Ten four, back door.
Put the peddle to the metal, whatcha…waitin’ for?
That old flop
Can’t stay in sight,
Gonna leave you here and say no more,
How ’bout it?”
“Whoa, now, buddy, that’s fightin’ talk,
I’d get up there and blow your doors off!”
Well I hammered down like I had wings,
Little gravels in my wheels going ping, ping, ping.
‘Bout the time I hit ninety-two,
Saw something flashing’ in my rear view.
Thought to myself that can’t be true,
But there it was, old blue, blue, blue.
Uh oh. Bubble gum machine done hit the jackpot.
Well I could see that bear, laughing big,
Hangin’ in tight on the back of my rig.
Right there and then it came to be wall to wall.
Mm-hmm.
So in that cold dark Georgia night,
In the shadows of Smokey bear’s blue light,
I ‘cided to make me just one more CB call.
“Breaker one nine for the super trooper,
Hey there, Smokey old buddy, tell me if I’m right,
Are you my front door? Are you the White Knight? Come on?”
And he said —
“Ten four, back door.
You’re in a heap of trouble boy…that’s for sure.
Gonna read you your rights and treat you fair.
Pull over there,
With your…rockin’ chair.
Want you boys to know each other real well,
‘Cause you gonna be sharin’ the same jail cell.
You make twelve cotton pickers I’ve caught tonight,
From the front door of that White Knight.
Hhha-hhha-hhha-hhha-hhha-hhha!!
How ’bout it?
Hhha-hhha-hhha-hhha-hhha-hhha!!
Forty miles over the speed limit!
You boys gonna be here a spell.
Hhha-hhha-hhha-hhha-hhha-hhha!!
Hhha-hhha-hhha-hhha-hhha-hhha!!”
That’s it, cotton pickers, I’ve done been grounded;
My tail’s in jail, my rig impounded.
So when you’re comin’ through the Georgia night,
Don’t ever get no front door called the White Knight.
No sir. Wind up in the pokey with Smokey.
I’m gonna pull that old CB thing out by the wires.
I don’t care if it is..

Image Credits

In-Article Image Credits

LTD by Browning advertisement CB Magazine November 1973 via CB Magazine with usage type - Product photo (Fair Use). Browning Laboratories Inc.
My friend, Al Gorss Inventor of the "Walkie-Talkie" via Wikipedia Commons by Kb7use with usage type - Public Domain. 1999