I have never slept so well in all my life

Tom had a recurring problem of oversleeping in the morning. He was always late for work. His boss became angry and threatened to fire him if he showed up late for work again. Tom explained that he had trouble sleeping and was always tired. The boss suggested he go see a doctor about it.

A nervous little man, wandered into a tough biker bar in the Bronx and clearing his throat asked, “Um, err, which of you gentlemen owns the Doberman tied outside to the parking meter?”

On Christmas morning a cop on horseback is sitting at a traffic light, and next to him is a kid on his brand new bike. The cop says to the kid, “Nice bike you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?”

A woman in Brooklyn decided to prepare her Will and make her final requests. She told her rabbi she had two final requests. First, she wanted to be cremated, and second, she wanted her ashes scattered all over Bloomingdales.

Two women that are dog owners are arguing about which one had the smartest dog. First Woman : “My dog is so smart, every morning he waits for the paper boy to come around and then he takes the newspaper and brings it to me.

Once there was a millionaire, who collected live alligators. He kept them in the pool in back of his mansion. The millionaire also had a beautiful daughter who was single. One day, the millionaire decides to throw a huge party, and during the party he announces…

How kittens get revenge on dogs.

Oh hey, here’s your problem right here

A burglar breaks into a home. He spots a stereo system that looks good so he grabs it. Then he hears a voice “JESUS is watching you”.

A young couple are recently married. Seeking some privacy, the groom asks his new bride if he can have a dresser drawer of his own with the condition that she never opens the drawer. The bride agrees.