A nerd walks into a bar (he wasn’t wearing his glasses). And…
A virus walks into a bar. The bartender says we don’t serve viruses. The virus replaces the bartender and says, “Now we do.”
An infectious disease walks into a bar. The bartender says, “We don’t serve infectious diseases.” The infectious disease says “Well, you’re not a very good host.”
Two bacteria walk into a bar. The bartender says, “We don’t serve bacteria in this bar.” The bacterias say, “But we work here, we’re Staph.”
A room temperature super conductor walks into the bar. The bartender says, “We don’t serve room temperature super conductors here.” The room temperature super conductor leaves without putting up any resistance.
A neutron walks into a bar. The bartender serves him and when the neutron asks how much his tab is, the barkeep responds, “for you? No charge.”
An infrared photon walks into a bar and says, “Is it hot in here or is it just me.”
A neutrino walks into a bar. The bartender says, “We don’t serve neutrinos in this bar.” The neutrino says “Hey, I was just passing through.”
Schrodinger’s Cat walks into a bar…and doesn’t.
The Higgs boson walks into a church. The priest says “We don’t allow Higgs boson in here. The Higgs boson says, “But without me how can you have mass?”
A statistician walks into just your average bar. The bartender says, “We don’t serve statisticians.” The statistician says, “Well you’re just mean.”
An alchemist walks into a bar. “12 glasses of water please.” He winks at his friends.
Some Helium gas drifts into the bar. “The bartender says we don’t serve Helium.” The Helium doesn’t react.
A bunch of Uranium-238 walks into a bar. 4.47 billion years later half of them are still there.
The bartender says, “we don’t serve tachyons here.” A tachyon walks into a bar.
