No free advice

A doctor and an attorney were attending a formal party where they started up a casual conversation. As they talked, people kept approaching the doctor describing their aches and pains and asking the doctor for advice.

I ran across this collection of geek one-liners that only a geek would appreciate… There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don’t If at first you don’t succeed; call it version 1.0 I’m not anti-social; I’m just not user friendly My software never has bugs. It…

Funny animals and their crazy thoughts

Here’s a collection of funny animal pictures and the funny thoughts they must have.

Phyllis Diller jokes tended to focus on her failings as a housewife, her lack of sex appeal, and the shortcomings of an imaginary husband (Fang) and overweight mother-in-law. Here are a few of Phyllis Diller’s famouse funny lines and quotes.

A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel for a big chess convention. The chess players were standing in the center of the lobby, gathered in a large circle, discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the hotel manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. “But why?”, they…

A woman has twins, but sadly, has to give them up for adoption. One of the twins goes to a family in Egypt and is named ‘Amal.’ The other twin goes to a family in Spain, they name him ‘Juan’. Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the…

A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is seeing another woman. She goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband sitting in the living room with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head,…

This chain letter made the rounds in May 2012 and explains the stages of life including truths that children and adults have learned and the definition of success at each stage in life.

Now mind your own business

This guy put this sign in his front window to explain his life to his neighbors and then tells them what they can do with it.

Photoshop comedian

In this hilarious exchange, a fun-loving family member toys with the other family members trying to get a missing family member photoshopped into a vacation picture.