19 Ways to Confuse Santa Claus

Laughing cat funny jokes with text

19 Ways to Confuse Santa Claus 1. Instead of milk and cookies, leave him a salad, and a note explaining that you think he could stand to lose a few pounds. 2. While he’s in the house, go find his sleigh and write him a speeding ticket. 3. Leave him a note explaining that you’ve…

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12 Ways to Get Rid of a Telemarketer

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1. If they want to loan you money, tell them you just filed for bankruptcy andyou could sure use some money. Ask, “How long can I keep it? Do I have toever pay it back, or is it like the other money I borrowed before mybankruptcy?” 2. If you get one of those pushy people…

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10 Ways to Tell Santa is a Computer Nerd

Laughing cat funny jokes with text

10.He’s got long hair, a beard and wears the same clothes all the time.9. He hangs out with a weird group of friends he calls “elves”.8. He’s got a goofy laugh and chuckles at anything.7. He loves getting mail.6. Children like him, teenagers laugh at him, adults pretend he doesn’t exist.5. He makes all the…

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10 Commandments of a Teenagers

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1) thou shall not sneak out when parents are sleeping. (why wait?) 2) thou shall not do drugs (you can break this one, it not that important) 3) thou shall not steal from k-mart. (walmart has a bigger selection) 4) thou shall not get arrested for vandalism. (destruction has a bigger effect) 5) thou shall…

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Women: How You Can Get 5,625 Men

Laughing cat funny jokes with text

This chain letter was started in hopes of bringing relief to other tired and frustrated women. Unlike most chain letters, this one does not cost anything. Just send a copy of this letter to five of your friends, who are equally tired and frustrated. Then bundle up your husband or boyfriend and send him to…

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Funny (but true) medical quotes

Old surgery

The things that medical staff write in reports.  The following are true excerpts from the medical reports of a UK hospital. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year…

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Animal Quiz

Two giraffe neck and head

The following short quiz consists of 4 questions. The questions are not that difficult. 1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? SCOLL DOWN > > > > > > > > > > > The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe and close the door. This question tests…

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The history of comedy

MonkeyLaugh

How long has comedy been around? Check out the history of comedy in this “serious” article about how comedy shaped the world as we know it.

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