The control I have over my wife

Three men are talking about their wives. Two of the men are talking about the control they have over their wives, while the third remains silent. After a while, the first two men turn to the third and ask, “What about you? What kind of control do you have over your wife?”

Frantically readying for a fancy French party, the wife asks the husband if he can run to the store and buy some escargot for the party. “Sure!”, he says and tears out the door. On the way he decides to stop at his favorite bar for a quick drink. After and hour or so, he…

A store that sells new husbands has opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates…

Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A cell phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands-free speaker function and begins to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen.

A man feared his wife wasn’t hearing as well as she used to and he thought she might need a hearing aid. Not quite sure how to approach her, he called the family Doctor to discuss the problem.

A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push. “Not a chance,” says the husband, “it is 3:00 in the morning!” He slams the…